Closure....

Closure is a oft-used word to describe an end to a usually painful experience.

Recently my understanding of this word has been tested by a recent experience of my hub. After some 3 yrs of agonizing wait involving the all impt "not knowing what's going to happen to me", he (and me) finally got closure via a judgement made by 3 supposed wise men.

The decision was a harsh one given that it was noted that it was a one-off event BUT for what it's worth, it gave closure. Closure because it allowed my hub to put in place his work plans for the next 1+ yrs....plans which were in a way dependant on this outcome. Closure for me cos I now know how to plan for the family....

I must admit I was saddened that he can't continue with what he has been doing for the past 10+ years of his life but i try to help him by looking things on the bright side. It's frightening for both of us cos he basically knows how to do this 1 job only to be told he can't do it for the next 1+year.....the blessings i have so far counted for him are:

1. he is not too old to start looking for something else - at least not in heart and mind. he's not really learning new tricks but in a way adapting his work to new environment. He thinks his new environment is better as it's anything goes from now on without outside inhibitions or restrictions.
   
2. in the process of this journey, he found out who his friends are. I am glad....

• Friends who basically stood by him, to comfort him - including spending sleepless nights & many many hours preparing for the case & those who couldn't sleep just because they were worrying about the outcome.
  
• Unfortunately or fortunately, he also found out those who took flight at the sight of any "danger"...... although it was terribly hard for him to experience that type of betrayal of friendship but it's part of life's lessons & better now than later when you really need to count on that person.
  
• A friend who got him an air ticket just because & another who travelled from one end of the island to another to just have drinks with him & see how he was......

He sent me a message earlier to thank me for being there for him.....being strong for him. Essentially that's the only way I know how to cope....following life's disappointments and setbacks, comes the strength and the resilience - this is my grandma's life lesson "Only when I believe that I am down will everyone else see me as downtrodden."
& our vows are "to walk together thru good times & bad times....."

Finally I gave hub a challenge to show those who brought him down this time round that he's still standing & on top of that, make a success out of this period.

Wish us luck!